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Aargh-Ga-Doo
Damian Ainsworth2 Feb - 16:53
Menston Mourn As Ossett Do The Conga Into County Cup Semi-Final
Open the page for Ossett and you will be witness to one of Wikipedia's most egregious errors. For, click on 'culture' and you will read the words, "this section is empty". To describe Ossett as an oasis of culture is to overlook one of the most notable bands in British musical history. They are a band whose music represents a significant chapter in pop. One can perhaps map the trajectory of British pop from 'I Want To Hold Your Hand' to 'Gimme Shelter', on to 'Stairway To Heaven' and 'Bohemian Rhapsody', before landing at 'Agadoo' by Ossett's finest export, Black Lace.
Black Lace were, and remain, a cruelly underrated band. They were mavericks, renegades, committed to overthrowing the established order and setting fire to convention. During the dismal Thatcher years of the early 80s, they came closer than anyone to distilling the misery of living in a crumbling northern wasteland. Their lyric, 'agadoo-doo-doo, push pineapple, shake the tree, agadoo-doo-doo, push pineapple, grind coffee' was simultaneously a shot across the bows of cruel corporate capitalism and a call to arms for the militant youth, fed up with their voiceless status.
On a springlike February afternoon at St Mary's, Menston Rangers took on Ossett United in the County Cup, hoping to secure a place in the semi-finals. Rangers started the brightest, immediately putting the home defence under pressure, and took the lead after only five minutes when Machell fed Ainsworth, who made no mistake. Ainsworth was a constant menace in the opening period and had a glorious chance to make it two when put through by the returning Lambertino, but his usual precision finishing failed him. Ossett began to grow into the game, using the expansive playing surface to their advantage, as the Menston players worked hard to maintain the advantage. However, a horror five minutes before half-time turned the match on its head, and Ossett scored twice to go into the break in front.
United continued to stretch Menston during the second half, limiting them to half chances. Hutchinson and Barker were outstanding in defence but luck was not with the home team. Bates had failed a late fitness test, Taylor and Lambertino, key players both, went off injured, and the still absent Macauley's clinical finishing was sorely missed up front. As the match entered its death throes, Menston threw caution to the wind and this allowed Ossett to break clear and add a third. Barely a minute later, Menston pulled one back when Holliday-Gomes pounced. The crowd held its collective breath. As a free-kick was awarded in the last minute of added time, the massed ranks of supporters allowed themselves to dream. The ball fell to Casey but those dreams of glory were dashed as he shot over and the final whistle blew.
Ultimately a dispiriting afternoon but there remains plenty to play for this season.
Black Lace were, and remain, a cruelly underrated band. They were mavericks, renegades, committed to overthrowing the established order and setting fire to convention. During the dismal Thatcher years of the early 80s, they came closer than anyone to distilling the misery of living in a crumbling northern wasteland. Their lyric, 'agadoo-doo-doo, push pineapple, shake the tree, agadoo-doo-doo, push pineapple, grind coffee' was simultaneously a shot across the bows of cruel corporate capitalism and a call to arms for the militant youth, fed up with their voiceless status.
On a springlike February afternoon at St Mary's, Menston Rangers took on Ossett United in the County Cup, hoping to secure a place in the semi-finals. Rangers started the brightest, immediately putting the home defence under pressure, and took the lead after only five minutes when Machell fed Ainsworth, who made no mistake. Ainsworth was a constant menace in the opening period and had a glorious chance to make it two when put through by the returning Lambertino, but his usual precision finishing failed him. Ossett began to grow into the game, using the expansive playing surface to their advantage, as the Menston players worked hard to maintain the advantage. However, a horror five minutes before half-time turned the match on its head, and Ossett scored twice to go into the break in front.
United continued to stretch Menston during the second half, limiting them to half chances. Hutchinson and Barker were outstanding in defence but luck was not with the home team. Bates had failed a late fitness test, Taylor and Lambertino, key players both, went off injured, and the still absent Macauley's clinical finishing was sorely missed up front. As the match entered its death throes, Menston threw caution to the wind and this allowed Ossett to break clear and add a third. Barely a minute later, Menston pulled one back when Holliday-Gomes pounced. The crowd held its collective breath. As a free-kick was awarded in the last minute of added time, the massed ranks of supporters allowed themselves to dream. The ball fell to Casey but those dreams of glory were dashed as he shot over and the final whistle blew.
Ultimately a dispiriting afternoon but there remains plenty to play for this season.
Further reading